There was a strange rush when he left the room
and I'm not quite sure it was just the draft that he was pulling through the door with him.
There was a strange sense of revival as we sat talking until 3:30 am
and I'm not quite sure it was the energy drink I foolishly decided to gulp down.
There was a strange pulsing of blood rippling through my veins
and I'm not quite sure it was just my lack of sleep grabbing my attention.
What a strange, strange feeling it all seems to be...
this sudden grip of tantalizing tension,
this sudden grasp of vines around my stomach,
this sudden hold on my heart, as if it might start beating fervently again.
I don't quite know if it's all normal and right, what seems to be happening.
It's a phenomenon I have not experienced in over 2 years and I feel quite guilty being in the mix again,
although I know it's only a matter of time before my world catches up to its natural rotational speed.
It's small and it's meaningless but it truly is the little things that can make all the difference in the world, in my world at least.
I cannot try to make predictions of the future, that will only bring me worry and angst.
I can only try to live here, live now... but live here purely and live now righteously.
I can only hope that through this sprouting friendship, the Lord's glory and radiance will shine through me, simply a mirror reflecting his love, not my own, conditional love.
What comes next, I do not know, as I often don't, but what I can know is that as long as my Lord and Savior is the one being reflected from my feeble mirror, only good will prevail.
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